Monthly Archives: April 2016

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How do you know all of that???

I live in a very small town in east Tennessee, and absolutely love living there; however, there ARE a few drawbacks. The one that I have the biggest adjustment problem with, is the lack of restaurants. We only had two…that is, until recently.  The sweetest couple from New York (by way of Florida) opened up a little pizzeria/Italian place, and the food is simply wonderful. That, along with the fact that they treat me like a queen when I walk in, assures that I will be a life-long customer! I eat there about once a week, and eating so much Italian food got me to thinking about another Italian restaurant in Georgia…

My best friend’s cousin was getting married, and the entire family was invited, not only to the wedding, but to the rehearsal dinner as well. It was going to be a fun, family time (with lots of talking and laughter) at a wonderful restaurant named Maggiano’s. The tables were reserved for us, and decorated beautifully. They had placed all of the cousins at one large table, so we knew it was going to be fun. The menu was simply unbelievable!! They had decided to give us a sample of almost everything on the menu for our meal! Scrumptious!!

My friend’s first cousin was sitting next to me, and we were visiting, talking, and eating. Each time they would serve a new sample, he would look at me and ask,” What is that?” I replied, “Spinach and Artichoke al Forno.” He commented how good it was! They served the next item. Once again, he looked at me and asked, “What is this?” I said, “Tomato Caprese.” It went on like this all night…he would ask, and I would reply, “Shrimp Fra  Diavolo,” or “Four-cheese Ravioli,” or “Lobster Carbonara.” You get the idea. Finally, he looked at me, and said, “I am some kinda impressed! You know ALL the names of the food dishes. Just HOW do you know all of that?” I smiled sweetly, and said, “Well…it’s all printed up for us on this little menu sitting in front of your plate.” We all just busted out laughing!!! He had never seen the printed menu laying there in front of him! He was a good sport and joined in with all the laughter.

There are times in life that we simply do not know the answers to any of the questions. We immediately begin asking others for advice and information; however, sometimes the very answers we need are right in front of our eyes. All of us possess innate skills and abilities, but far too often we are convinced that we are inadequate, or even inferior, to the knowledge, education and experience of others. We sell ourselves short! And I have found that when you continually compare yourself to others, you can ALWAYS find someone who has more expertise or knowledge than you do. On the other hand, there are also many that do not have the knowledge or experience in areas in which you excel. So why are you comparing? Look deep inside yourself first, do the research, really look at what is around you before you begin asking others for those very necessary “answers.” Sometimes the “menu” is right before your very eyes! Won’t you join me? Just for this week…

 

 

 

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The sweetest lady took care of me last night…

Those of you who have followed this blog have noticed that I have been “quiet” for a while. Every now and then you simply need a little time to “refresh” yourself, and I guess that is what I have been doing. “They” tell us that most individuals conduct a “self-analysis” of their lives every 10-12 years – to determine if we are on the “right path;” or if our accomplishments have been what we strove to attain; or simply if we are “happy.” This self-examination often coincides with those birthdays that end in a “zero.” I have always been off schedule in that my self evaluations never coincide with the BIG birthdays…So I guess that is what I have been doing for the last 9 months or so. I keep thinking that maybe people are tired of my stories and that I should stop, but then I get an annual report that indicates I have thousands of followers in 77 countries. Those numbers simply take my breath away! I am humbled, and think, that maybe, just maybe, people need to hear some of my truths…and some of my craziness. So……I am back for a while. Hope you enjoy, and if you do, please become a follower, and leave me a comment now and then. I love hearing from you guys!

Most of you know that my Mama is the main reason for this blog, that she had Alzheimer’s Disease, and that some of the stories involve our journey through that living hell. Today is such a story. We tried to keep Mother at home, as long as possible, taking care of her ourselves. My Father was the main caregiver, with help from each of the children. Each month, I would go down and stay with them for a week or two at a time.

On this particular visit, Mama certainly recognized me, and during the days, we would visit, laugh, and love on each other. Each night, I would sleep in a bed right next to hers so that I would be able to hear if she needed something, or attempted to get up by herself. On this night, she woke up around midnight, needing to go to the bathroom. We kept a potty chair at her bedside during the night to make everything easier and more comfortable for her. I got up and helped her get out of bed, and assisted her with both verbal direction and physical assistance. When your brain is atrophying, and signals are being neither sent nor received, something so simple as going to the bathroom can become a huge challenge for both the caregiver and the person needing care. It took us a while, but with patience, compassion, and simple communication, we were able to accomplish what she needed.

The next morning, Mama woke up early, all bright and cheerful. I jumped up, went over to her, gave her a kiss and said, “Good morning!” As I was helping her up for that first cup of coffee, she looked at me and said, “The sweetest lady helped me all night long! She was so nice!” I looked at her and said, “Mama, that is wonderful! I am so glad that someone sweet was there to help you.”

Now, as we know, I WAS THAT SWEET LADY! In the night, she never knew, or recognized, that it was her own daughter providing care and assistance. And for me, it just did not matter! I did not care WHO got the credit for providing the care. I was just glad that she saw me as someone who was caring, sweet, and willing to help.

This event made me wonder how we view ourselves when helping another person(s), and why we choose to help someone else. I am not referring to just health care, or physical assistance. I’m talking about ANY time we provide help, whether it is giving someone directions who is lost, holding a door open for someone out of courtesy, slipping someone a little cash to cover an unmet need, lending physical assistance when friends are moving into a new house, or just listening when someone needs to talk. It could be ANYTHING!! Do we provide help because we want recognition or credit that we “did a good deed,” or because it makes us look good to others? Is it a selfless act, wanting nothing in return? Or do we want “credit where credit is due?” I often wonder if we would be as generous in our giving, if we knew no one would ever know… A.M. Burton, grandfather to Amy Grant (a well-known gospel singer), stated the following: “Life is made up of golden chances, opportunities to do good. One lost is lost forever. If we miss doing a kindness to a friend, we can never do that kindness again. If we might speak a pleasant word, or offer a bit of worthwhile counsel or advice and fail to do so, we can never have just that opportunity again. Giving is a way of life.” I want my giving and helping to be selfless. I don’t need the recognition or credit. I want it to be given out of caring and love. Won’t you join me? Just for this week…