I heard from my Mama today…

Most of you knowimg_3031 that I began this blog as a result of the sadness I felt from my Mother’s journey into the world of Alzheimer’s Disease. She has been gone from us for over four years now. Some days it feels like a lifetime ago, and on others it feels like it just happened yesterday. The hole in my heart is just as large, and the loss is still unfathomable. If you have read many of my posts, you probably also know that I struggled because I no longer felt her near me. In my head, I had thought that because of our closeness, she would find a way to let me know she was still around, close to me, after she died. That did not happen, and I was distraught. That changed a while back, and here is the story…

Here is the background…my Mama was a seriously happy and positive woman! She would get up every morning singing. The songs were either gospel or, because she and Daddy loved the musical, “Oklahoma,” she would sing, “Oh, What a Beautiful Morning.” In fact, she loved that song so much that we had it playing at her wake as one of the background songs to her “Memories Video.” We loved to hear her sing that song!

Now to the present…I speak at a lot of different conferences across the United States. Usually at those conferences, they will have an evening banquet/awards dinner, or an awards luncheon.  And almost always, there is some kind of entertainment at those events. I don’t always get to stay for the festivities, but sometimes, due to flight schedules, I can at least eat a bite before I take off for another location.

On this particular trip, I had been the keynote speaker for a large conference in New Jersey. I love going to this particular conference because over the years, I have met and made some lifetime friends in this state. They bring smiles to both my face and heart. I had finished with my speaking commitments, and had to leave for the airport. Fortunately, for me, I had a later flight and was able to stay for the Awards Luncheon (and get something to eat). I was sitting with two of those very dear friends, who knew of my loss, and knew that I was still desolate.

As we were eating, they had a DJ playing my very favorite kind of music – 70’s disco! All of us were singing along with the songs, and “chair-dancing” between bites of food. He played song, after song, after song – and we knew ALL the words to every song! We relived where we were, who we were with, and what we were doing when the songs were popular. We were having a great time when, all of a sudden, he played a song that was NOT disco, NOT 70’s, NOT anything relative to his theme. Right smack dab in the middle of his playlist was……you guessed it, “Oh, What a Beautiful Morning!” Everyone looked up as if to say, “What in the world??? That’s not disco!” I was already crying because I knew the song was from my Mama. Everyone at my table knew too, and they were crying also. They kept hugging me and saying, “It’s a message from your Mom.”

Now, you may say, that just doesn’t make sense…that I am trying to put meaning and “message” to a “happenstance” occurrence to meet an emotional and psychological need for myself. You may have a point, but….you should ask yourself these questions: just how many times have you heard a song from the musical, “Oklahoma,” played in the middle of a DJ’s 70’s disco playlist? And what are the odds of it being the very same song that my Mama sang most mornings? I choose to believe that somehow my Mama got a message to me – to let me know that everything was going to be OK, and that she was still close by. The thought comforts me, and I can almost hear her saying, “It will be alright, baby.” I continue to be amazed at the wonder and mystery of our universe, and always believe that the impossible is possible! Won’t you join me? Just for this week…

 

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